younger than Springtime - older than Dirt:

does age difference matter in a relationship?


tayyaba bhtti says "yes"...

Love is supposed to be blind, isn't it? If you agree then age difference shouldn't matter in a relationship. Some people insist that a large age gap between two partners is unhealthy. They say that if you're say 16 and your partner's 25 then it sounds a little odd. But if you grow old together then being 66 with a 75 year old partner sounds perfectly acceptable. Exposure talked to some teenagers who agreed that age shouldn't matter in a relationship. "It's good if one partner is older because they'll be able to provide more security," said Jane, age 15.

"Boys my age are so immature. They don't understand my feelings. Older guys appeal more to me. Their sense of maturity is so excellent," said Jo, 17 Turnpike Lane. Raj, age18 added:

"Age doesn't matter! It's like saying let me check your shoe size and if it's bigger than mine then I don't love you. Sounds stupid!"

Most people assume that the man should be the older partner. Women, after all, tend to grow up faster than men. If the man is say five to ten years older, the couple will be at the same level of maturity. But what if the woman is the one who's older? Many people react negatively to such an idea with glib phrases like 'she's got a toy-boy' or 'she's a cradle-snatcher'. But if you think about it, in the long run, a woman being older than her man makes perfect sense. On average, women live at least half a dozen years longer than men. So, in theory, if a woman is five or six years older than her man, the couple can share the rest of their lives together, rather than the woman ending up a lonely widow. People who disapprove of mixed marriages are often called racists. Shouldn't people who condemn a big age gap in a relationship be accused of ageism?

Written by Tayyaba Bhatti



[...while her sister azra argues "no"]

W ould you snog someone the same age as your parents? Would you want someone who disapproves of what you do and always knows best? Would you want to spend most of your later years alone, because your partner had kicked the bucket ages ago? Exposure asked some sensible teenagers why they wouldn't get into a relationship with someone a lot older than them.

"It's better if you marry someone near your age because you can relate to them more and have a better understanding," said Susan, age 13.

"If you got into a relationship with someone a lot older than you then all you'd ever hear is 'in my day...' this and 'in my day...' that!" said Fayz, age 17. George, age 16 said:

"She'd end up dying 'cos of her old age and I'd end up a widower!"

"I think it's ridiculous. I want a husband not a father!'" said Aleena, age 16. Of course it takes two to tango. What about the adults involved in relationships with younger people?

How would you feel if your mum was in a relationship with someone closer to your age than to hers? Joanna (name changed) was in this position. Her mother started to go out with one of Joanna's male college friends. It soon led to her parents divorcing and Joanna leaving home. She doesn't talk to her mum anymore and lives with her aunt. Realistically, what can someone in their 20s or 30s possibly have in common with a teenage girl or boy? An attraction of this sort can only be based on the physical.

"Younger girls may have better skin and nicer figures but that's all on the surface. It's far more important what's on the inside. Mutual love, understanding and respect can only develop with someone you can relate to in a deeper, more meaningful way. That means someone with similar life experiences," said Danny, age 34.

"I could never go out with a younger guy. He just wouldn't be developed. He wouldn't be 'man enough' in terms of knowledge, experience and responsibilities. I have to live in the real world. I need a guy who's in that world, not someone who's still dreaming!" said Barbara, age 27


Written by Azra Bhatti


Reprinted by kind permission of our friends at 

Exposure Magazine


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